Dear Prime Minister Nielsen

                                                                            February 6, 2026

His Excellency Jens-Frederik Nielsen

Prime Minister of Greenland

Government of Greenland

Nuuk, Greenland

Dear Prime Minister Nielsen,

I’m sure that most American citizens do not support the purchase or annexation of Greenland by the United States. Indeed, many of us are embarrassed. I’m also furious about the strain this is putting on the NATO Alliance.

I’d like you to consider a different transaction. It’s not practical for Greenland to buy the entire United States, but how about just my home state? New Jersey has much to offer and we would be honored to rename ourselves as New Greenland.

If this seems like a good idea, let me know and I’ll put you in touch with the Governor Sherril.

One other thing: if Trump hears about any of this and threatens to execute me for treason or crime de lèse-majesté, could you arrange for my political asylum?

I look forward to hearing from you and hope all is well with you and yours,